Sometimes I get super guilty about not doing things "the industry" has said I should be doing in order to "succeed".
I feel like I should be doing webinars. And facebook advertising. No, twitter. Instagram? And bigger, more exciting launches and guest posts and interviews and newsletters and and and...
I can inherently see the value in these things and know that they might actually be beneficial, but there's just one problem.
I don't actually want to do them.
Every time I even think about doing them, my whole body tenses up. I'll stare at papers and plans for hours and my soul just can't bring yourself to make it work. Or to even start. The thought of doing the things bores the HELL out of me.
Do you ever feel like this? That feeling that even if you tell yourself you'll do it eventually, and have even made plans to do it but still haven't? There's a reason for that. And it's not because we're lazy. It's simply because we don't want to.
It isn't a strength of ours.
It isn't an interest.
It isn't a priority.
So we can only do one of two things in this situation: we can either make it a priority and stop dicking around...Or we can:
@@Throw it out the window and see how it feels.@@
Because having this huge thing on your mind without doing anything about it has a larger effect on your mindset and neurological health than you actually realise.
It's called the Zeigarnik effect, and it basically means that you cannot move forward or even perform effectively when you still have "that thing" at the back of your mind, plaguing you with guilt because you haven't done it yet.
It's time to move forward.
I'm doing this at the moment. I wanted to do guest posting at least once a week because it's obviously the thing to do in order to promote myself. I love connecting with people, I love writing, what could go wrong, right? On paper it seemed fine, but when it came down to it, the thought of force-writing another post each and every week, plus pitching just suddenly felt too much on top of everything else I do weekly. It took me a while to admit it to myself and I kept putting it off in the form of excuses and complaints. For example:
"Ugh, I don't like the idea of being forced to do stuff."
"I hate when I have to do things on a schedule."
"Pitching to so many different people each week is going to be time consuming and confusing."
"I don't have a good system to keep track of pitches."
"I'll have to hold back articles that I'll just want to share on my own blog."
"I don't even know where to start." << this is a big one. I can guarantee you do, you just don't want to.
I also recently threw an idea to create an audio course shop out of the window which had held me back for weeks (because I was forcing monetisation when my soul just wanted to give it away for free.)
@@When your body, mind and soul say "ugh", listen.@@
Now, let me tell you the best thing about this. When you throw shit out of the window, it honestly gives so much room to your strengths. Because you know what happened immediately after I let go of these issues? My mind went:
"Ahhh, great! Now we can focus on what I REALLY want to do."
For me, that's focusing on the people I already have and empowering them to share the message. I want to invite people into my world in my own way. I'm a flaky transgressive artist, I don't like to be on any schedules. Sure it may take longer for me to get awareness for my movement, but it will feel one hundred times better to do it the way I want to.
Does that mean I will never guest post? Not at all. But at this specific time, that specific idea is out the window - because subconsciously it was in the way of how I really wanted to do things.
So here is my lesson to you: Listen to your own intuition, and remember that just because something may be the best method, if you don't want to do it then it obviously isn't the best method for you. (And if that's the case, chances are it won't work for you anyway.)
You don't actually have to do all the things you COULD possibly do. I promise you that.
You always have permission to let go of the things you don't love.
So throw it out the window.
See how you feel.Read More