There was a time when I wasn’t just fighting my own insecurities, I was fighting all the insecurities of others.
I'd been staring at the screen for hours, hands suspended over the keyboard and absolutely nothing was coming out.
In my head, there were all these questions like, am I good enough? Will I ever be good enough?
Then there were people telling me that writing wasn’t a “real” career; that it wasn’t something I would be able to make anything out of, that I was fighting an uphill battle I probably wouldn’t win and that I should probably do something else.
Having people tell me to give it up was like telling me that I was useless, worthless, and didn’t have a place in this world. So I knew I either had to give up on the dream, or find a solution.
And now, as I worried that my hands would never produce a single word again, I knew it wasn't really the people or their stories that had shaken me. It was about the bigger problem: If I can't make it as a writer, what else do I have to give to the world?
When I thought about the life I'd have to live if I gave into my fears and gave up writing, I couldn't BREATHE.
It was unthinkable.
I had to figure out a solution or I wouldn't survive - so there was no other option.
I didn't want to feel that way.
I wanted to wholeheartedly believe in myself again.
I wanted to be unstoppable.
I knew I could either sit there and let the fears get the best of me, or I could psych myself up, and find a way to ensure that I NEVER felt so helpless or disempowered ever again.
As I sat in front of that keyboard, flexing my fingers, willing something - anything - to come out onto the paper, I had an important revelation.
@@All writing problems are emotional.@@
Because through all of my self-doubt, even in my darkest moments...
Nothing about my ability had changed. The rate I could produce work didn't change.
Nothing changed except the way I felt, and that changed everything.
I pulled my consciousness (kicking and screaming), through its own journey of self-transformation that freed me from fear and allowed me to finally reconnect with what I like to call my #wholewriter, write over 160+ stories, poems and plays, win national awards and feel confident and fulfilled in my work every single day.
What I produced then also became my guiding philosophy for everything I now stand for - the comprehensive, step-by-step guide to removing the mental, emotional and spiritual barriers that were preventing me from leading the life I was destined to lead.
Your emotional state can always be changed back, for the better. You can always find your way back to wholeness.
And I can show you how.